7 Habits for Writers | #4: Think Win-Win
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In our 7 Habits of Highly Effective Writers series, we’re changing gears to shift from the private habits into habits that are practiced with other people. Kicking off our public habits is Habit 4: Think win-win. You might immediately think of this mindset being important in business or that it’s simply a sales technique. However, thinking win-win is a philosophy as much as it is a practical technique that can be applied to most aspects of life—including writing.
No matter where you find yourself in your journey, writers at all stages can benefit from investing in these habits. If you’re considering putting your work into the world, the public habits are essential for success. That said, if you’re just jumping in here, I highly recommend going back to look at the first three private habits as these build the foundation for productive and valuable public habits (links in the box above).
What is an effective writer?
The goal of these habits is to make you effective. Again, an effective writer knows why they do what they do and understands how their process will get them where they want to go. It’s hard work, but the continual refinement you find in working through these habits will ensure you’re able to create and keep creating.
“Small things matter when they accumulate. This is one of the main lessons of my work—and one of the principles I try to follow in my life. The details, when finely polished and carefully combined, add up to something remarkable.”
—James Clear
An effective writer practices the three private habits
As a brief recap, here are the first three habits of an effective writer:
Solidifying these habits creates a strong foundation for the public habits. Because the presence and influence of other people will naturally test the strength of that foundation, it’s important to regularly check in with these habits and ensure your interactions are productive and intentional.
Think win-win
This is a frame of mind and heart that constantly seeks mutual benefit in all interactions. Essentially, you and the other person in that interaction need to “win”—achieve or acquire something, feel seen, gain understanding, or otherwise find success. While the business context might be strong in your mind, you can start to see how this philosophy provides useful insight for your creative endeavors as well.
Win-win for sharing your work
If you’re interested in sharing your work with other people, Habit 4—Think win-win—is a great place to start. It has the potential to shape your conversations with beta readers, critique partners, and even industry professionals like agents and editors. A mindset shift like this is necessary in order to move into the business side of writing because you automatically encounter other people—other people whose ideas, needs, and wants are different from yours. Being effective in the business of writing means understanding others and reaching out to find a path that works for everyone.
The six paradigms of thinking
The six primary mindset paradigms dramatically influence the ways we interact because they reflect our basic beliefs, not only of ourself but about other people as well. In the following sections, I’ll go through each one and demonstrate how these paradigms appear in writerly contexts.
The lose paradigms
The mindsets we’ll talk about here sometimes have a place in the writer’s life, as we’ll see. But more often, these lead to ways of thinking that aren’t helpful for writers looking to create long-term.
Win-lose—I win, you lose
We learn this mindset from school—its core is competition and comparison. It can be productive in a competitive setting, such as when you enter a contest, leading you to hone and polish your words in a way that other creative exercises can’t. However, this attitude becomes unhelpful when it’s applied to all contexts. Friendly competition with fellow writers can be beneficial, but avoid thinking that if someone wins (gets published, wins an award), someone else has to lose. This mindset can become unhelpful, turning you inward so you isolate from others for fear of someone stealing your ideas or somehow gaining an advantage.
Lose-win—You win, I lose
Here, you give up too easily because you expect to lose. You know the statistics of how hard it is to be published, and at the same time, you’re watching others happily posting about their success. It happens for others, but not for you. This mindset can lead you to one of two things. First, you do whatever it takes to be accepted, compromising your vision in order to find popularity. You might follow trends in hopes of latching on to some of the success others have found, but you’re acting without a good sense of why. Your actions aren’t aligned with your values. Second—and perhaps worse—you might not try at all.
Lose-lose—Both sides lose
Unfortunately, writers can fall into this mindset too. After suffering rejection and defeat, this mindset pushes writers to disparage and discourage. If they can’t get read or published, no one else should either. They resent others’ success, continually focusing on difficulty and slim or impossible odds.
The win paradigms
Here we transition to talk about mindsets that are inclined towards positive outcomes. These are healthy mindsets, though the first is sometimes an exception.
Win—I win
This mindset says it doesn’t matter what anyone else is doing. It doesn’t matter what books are doing well or what’s making waves in the industry. As long as you find success, it doesn’t matter what other people are doing. You follow your own vision. This is a great mindset to have while you create. However, if you’re seeking to put your work into the world, you need to be aware of expectations and standards that might be different from the ones you have. Remember, public habits are practiced with others, and if you’re interested in sharing your stories, it’s necessary to think about what the person on the other side of your story wants, too.
Win-win—Both sides win
Win-win is the belief in a third alternative, that there’s plenty for everybody, that everyone can get what they want. It’s not your way or my way—it’s a better, higher way. Everyone gets what they want and more. Win-win begins with your character, what’s driving you, and it moves into relationship with others. If it’s useful, think of this in terms of audience. Your values can guide you to make decisions that are good for everyone, sometimes solutions you wouldn’t consider without others in mind. You make revisions and changes based on what your audience expects or needs from you. Furthermore, revisions can bring out the strengths of our work and make it capable of reaching even more people.
Win-win or no deal—We both win, or we walk away
This mindset is foundational for the business side of writing, whenever you’re entering into a more formal agreement, say, with a publisher or an agent. It’s important to negotiate a win for both of you. I can tell you from personal experience that it’s tempting to compromise, to enter into a lose-win in this kind of situation—you’re simply delighted that someone is taking an interest in your work, so you make compromises or don’t push for better terms. However, lose-win will always result in problems down the road. It’s better to find a solution for everyone, or if none can be found, walk away. Sometimes a better opportunity is just around the corner.
Habit 4 makes you flexible
Creativity should be flexible. The imagination is capable of discovering all kinds of new solutions, and what you uncover to solve a problem may produce something even better than what you first imagined. “Think win-win” brings authors closer to their readers with its thoughtfulness and care for what they need, what they care about. Considering their needs and wants allows you to craft a book that’s exactly what they’re looking for and can’t resist.
Thinking win-win when submitting work
Making the transition from pure creation to submission can be difficult, especially if you’re a newer writer. The market is full of books, and more are being published every day. However, to gain confidence that your words are ready to be sent into the world, you can get critique from other authors, share your writing at conferences, or hire an editor. Working with editors like us is a great way to gain confidence because you’re getting one-on-one attention from industry professionals who keep up with current expectations and trends. Through manuscript assessments or developmental edits, we can help you revise your work for audiences while still retaining the magic of your original vision!
Thanks to Lance Grandahl and Katka Pavlickova for the photos in this post!
